Watch out, world, I am in a mood today.
There is a mischievous wild-child crouched in my brain today, concocting schemes of madness and mayhem to inflict on the unaware.
Nothing good or productive will flow from my fingers today. I will write no happy endings. I will type no words of encouragement to fellow wannabes. I will click no likes or follows.
Today I scorn the tears of tree-hugging environmentalists and applaud my friend’s purchase of a gas-guzzling SUV.
Today I laugh at the losers who spent thousands on lottery tickets and predict a lifetime of misery for the winners of millions.
Today I sneer at idiots in the public eye who can’t keep their fists to themselves and join the crowds of strangers who scream with one voice, “you suck!”
Today I believe the apocalypse is near, if only to squash the careful plans made by the hopeful.
Watch out, world, here I go…
…back to bed. This mood is exhausting.