Bravery

On the inside, it feels like necessity. It feels like someone is handing me a new toy and all I do is reach out and take it. It feels like seeing an open door and simply stepping through. It feels like a lifeline, a sharpened sword, the perfect tool, there when I need it most.…

Blush

A pretty word for such a dreaded event. Ah, my poor face, the blood is your enemy now. Not so in days past when young capillaries filled and emptied with efficiency. Then, a blush was a lovely addition, a cut flower, a temporary enhancement. Not so now, my matured skin, an old sponge that should have…

Belief

“Any rough times are behind you.” The fortune cookie tells me, and I choose to believe it. Why not? I can believe that times will be good from now on, it harms no one and makes me happy. Joy fills my head and fills my day and maybe the next day and the next and…

Beauty

Beauty is not a word I identify with. I was never the pretty one, I was smart, and smart was just as good. This does not imply that I feel ugly or un-beautiful. One's own sense of one's appearance is not a fact of black or white, regardless of one's skin. "Beauty comes from within,"…

Baggage

We all have stories. Memories, experiences, events – all substantial. Stories are heavy. But I’d prefer it if you’d carry yours behind you. When you hold it all out in front like that, thrusting it into the room before you, it is distracting, it is all I can see. You, the real you, disappears. It…

Axiom

Do I hold anything to be self-evident? I doubt it. Power doesn’t always corrupt. Rich men are not always in want of a wife. Certainly not all men are born equal, I know too many losers. I’ve never seen a cloud with any sort of lining at all. I am even vaguely convinced that one…

Awe

We have lost awe. It fell into awesome and drowned. Submerged and smothered into irrelevance, the potential for fear or wonder is now gone. In its place, we have the equivalent of a watered down great or a saccharine super. Awesome is only some awe, not all of it, just a little. Awful is even…

Anxiety

How can this be described? It is the blood, bubbling and fluttering behind the breast bone, filling the face and failing the feet. It is the guts inflamed, the muscles spasming, contracting the stomach and twisting the bowels. It is skin erupting in sweat, the hair follicles tightening. It is freezing, burning, chills and clammy…

Anger

If I could spit on you I would. There is no misinterpreting purposeful spit in the face. It can only mean anger. Anger of the vilest kind, deep and everlasting. An everlasting gobstopper of pissed off spit. Or maybe not so everlasting. I’d feel terrible about it eventually. Immediately. Before it happens and so it…

Amazement

“I am all amazement.” My eyes are full, growing large, welling and overflowing. A wonder to behold. To see is to believe, yet what I see is unbelievable. Is amazement all in the eyes then, something of sight and vision? Not taste or smell or touch at all? No, because I feel it in my…